Mommy Brain

“This is the most helpful book the beginning writer can buy….Superb!”
William Safire, The New York Times

The book mentioned in the above quote is How to Write by Herbert E. Meyer and Jill M. Meyer. As a beginning writer, I will definitely be reading this book. I’ve been given a free e-book copy to review for Mind and Media. However, the authors are offering this e-book for only $1.99 through their web site. If you’re an aspiring writer, or teaching your children to write, you should check this book out. At that price (less than a trip to Starbucks), what do you have to lose? Click on the graphic to go to their web site where you can read an excerpt and more reviews. I’ll be posting my review when I’m finished reading it — and it should be extremely well-written!

Do not despise these small beginnings, for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin…(Zechariah 4:10, NLT)

We step out in faith. We read the Word and we see an area in our lives, in our hearts, that needs changed. Seeing the problem doesn’t make it go away in an instant. Some habits or feelings have been part of our makeup for years, and it will take time to break them. But as we take those small first steps, the Lord rejoices because He sees the beginning of the work.

Great post today from Robin Lee Hatcher at Write Thinking.

I’m afraid to be thin. I need my excuses for not living the dreams You have placed in me.

I’m afraid of being hungry. What if You aren’t enough? That sounds like blasphemy, but it’s honest. If I stop feeding my pain, I’ll have to feel it. What if You’re not faithful? What if the pain goes on and on?

I’m afraid to cry because I’m afraid I’ll never stop.

I’m afraid to let anyone know how unhappy I am like this. I’m afraid they’ll hate me for choosing to get fat. I’m afraid to be real.

I’m afraid to stay this way. I want to run with my children. I want them to be proud of me. I want them to know they can do anything in You. How will they ever know that when I wear my own failure like a layer of insulation? It protects me. Nothing goes very deep; nothing gets through.

I’m afraid to try again. I’ve failed and failed and failed. I’ve given up. I’m afraid that one more failure will destroy me.

It’s up to You.

– If you tell 10 women they should bring snacks for between meals and before bed in case they get hungry, expect them to bring bags and bags of chocolate.

– There are few things more fun (or funny!) than listening to women tell how they met their husband.

– The best blessing you can give a mom is a chance to eat every meal all weekend long without having to get up before she’s done eating — or before she’s even taken a bite!

– The second best blessing is not having to clean up after said meals.

– Laughing long and hard is great exercise for the stomach.

– Friends that you can be real with are an awesome gift from God.

– If planning a retreat, don’t schedule every minute. Our retreat committee didn’t, and I was so grateful for lots of time to visit and rest and be alone and write.

– There is something about being away from home and distractions that allows God to minister to us and tell us things we need to hear.

– I can’t wait ’til next year!

(In the Beginning There Were No Diapers was provided to me free of charge by Mind and Media, who received it from the publisher for the purpose of being reviewed.)

“I wasn’t prepared to enjoy watching Paul play T-ball. I suspected the games would be slow and tedious. But when T-ball ended, I missed the unpredictable, fast action that only five-year-old boys can bring. Where else do you see unassisted triple plays in back-to-back innings and players who have the fine-tuned teamwork of a litter of puppies? What other sport’s athletes not only play for the love of the game but also for the snack at the end? When I missed a game, Paul beamed as he told me he got two hits but had even more exciting news. “Dad!” he said, licking his lips. “We each got our own pack of Oreos!” If professional baseball owners were smart, they’d sign T-ball players to lifetime contracts. The players would sign on the dotted line for peanuts — especially if they were chocolate covered….

T-ball players do get distracted at times. During one game, a player pointed toward center field as he took the plate. At first it appeared he was imitating Babe Ruth, showing the fans where he was going to hit a home run. Then I heard the sound of the ice cream truck passing by. The entire team turned and started walking — as if in a trance — toward the truck. All, except for the second baseman who was writing his name in the dirt, and the first baseman who was trying to catch a butterfly, and the right fielder who was practicing his somersaults.”

When I read that passage from In the Beginning There Were No Diapers by Tim Bete, my husband asked, “Is he from around here?” Actually, Mr. Bete lives in Ohio, but some things — like T-ball — about parenting are just universal. Mr. Bete has written about these “universals”, and done it with humor and grace.

From a pyramid scheme for rewarding children who successfully use the potty to a young girl’s description of pet heaven, this book had me laughing and shaking my head. It is amazing that you can add unique children to unique parents and still get the same results. For example, I give you Mr. Bete’s list of parenting anxieties:

– “The Our-kids-haven’t-eaten-anything-but-grilled-cheese-sandwiches-in-three-weeks anxiety”

– “The If-I-have-to-read-The-Cat-in-the-Hat-again-I’ll-scream anxiety”

– “The There-was-a-ladybug-on-the-floor-a-minute-ago-but-now-it’s-gone-and-the-baby-is-chewing-something anxiety”

– “The I-can-hear-the-Talking-Barbie’s-voice-but-it-sounds-like-it’s-coming-from-underwater-and-I-just-heard-the-toilet-flush anxiety”

I don’t know about you, but I can relate to all of these, or at least some variation of the same.

Not only did this book make me laugh and remind me of some of the stages we’ve successfully passed (whew!) with our children, it also reminded me what a miracle our children are and how amazing it is that God has trusted us to raise them.

I’m home. The weekend was wonderful, and I am completely exhausted. Something about sleeping in a cabin with 9 other women who also love to talk is not conducive to good sleep. I’ll post more tomorrow. Off to catch up on reading all of your blogs!

I’m leaving in a little over an hour and heading to Women’s Retreat. We’re staying at a lovely camp and the weather forecast is still promising wonderful days. I realize I haven’t posted much of substance this week. Hopefully I will come home with lots of renewed creativity and fun stuff to share. Have a wonderful weekend!

until I leave for Women’s Retreat. Two-and-a-half days and two nights away from home. Visiting and laughing with three of my best friends. Five meals that I didn’t have to cook and won’t have to clean up after. Quiet time to read my Bible next to a beautiful lake. Adult conversation. A weather forecast that’s in the high 60s and low 70s all weekend. I can’t wait.

Six years ago God gave us a gift. We named him Jonathan Nathanael. Both of these names mean gift of God.

Happy Birthday, Jonathan! Mommy loves you and is so proud of you.

I’ve been keeping a secret for the last couple of months. And since I’m the kind of gal who can’t buy Christmas presents too early because I’ll end up giving them and then have to buy more, I think I’ve done pretty good.

I have been planning a surprise party for Kevin’s 40th. I couldn’t post about it, because he occasionally reads my blog. So I haven’t said a word. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to get him to the church without knowing something was up. But I was still pretty happy with myself for managing to keep it from him that long.

We went to dinner at a local restaurant at 5:00. My past experience has been that it takes at least a half hour to be served. All our friends were going to arrive at the church at 6:15, and I was going to (somehow) get Kevin there by 6:30.

Well, our food arrived very quickly. We ate and visited and after we were finished, Kevin said, “Well, are you ready to go?” I looked at my watch and it was only 5:45. So I said no and we visited some more and then again at 6:15, Kevin’s ready to go. Normally we would sit and visit no problem, but since the kids woke both of us up at 4:30 and we hadn’t been able to go back to sleep, we were both extremely tired, and the longer we sat there the more we were passing yawns back and forth.

When I again said I didn’t want to go yet, he figured out something was up. So I ‘fessed up. And even though I didn’t manage to get him there in a state of obliviousness, I could tell by his smile he was pretty pleased that I’d gone to all the trouble. And when we got to the church and there were about 20 adults there (and oodles of children), he was pretty surprised.

It was a good evening. I’m exhausted, though. We had to clean up afterward, as we’re having a lasagna dinner at the church tonight. I still need to go over and vacuum the foyer and hallway sometime this morning. But it was worth it.

Kevin is 40 today, and I wanted to wish him Happy Birthday. We’re going out to dinner tonight without the kids. Woo-hoo! (Thank you, Mom and Dad.)

Just in case Hurricane Katrina hasn’t claimed enough victims:

Women’s Reproductive Health Care in the Aftermath of Hurricane Katrina

“NAF extends our deepest sympathies to all who have been affected by Katrina and the devastation wrought on the Gulf Coast region. While there are seemingly endless hurdles and obstacles Katrina’s victims will have to deal with in the coming weeks and months, we at NAF would like to make certain that those who need access to reproductive health care services are able to obtain the care they need.

Hurricane Katrina victims can call the NAF toll-free hotline to speak with professional hotline operators who can help with options counseling and with referrals to providers of quality reproductive health care services. On a limited basis, hotline staff also may be able to help raise the funds necessary to help cover the cost of quality abortion care.” (emphasis mine)

Oops, almost forgot — hat tip to Mr. O’Donnell for the link.

Billi-Jean tagged me for the 5 Years and 5 Things Ago meme.

First the rules:

Remove the blog at #1 from the following list and bump every one up one place; add your blog’s name in the #5 spot; link to each of the other blogs for the desired cross pollination effect.

1. Writing from the Hip: http://writingfromthehip.blogspot.com
2. Blue Stocking: http://bluestocking.typepad.com
3. Simply Coll: http://colleenscorner.com/blog
4. My Bountiful Life: http://billi-jean.com/thebounty.html
5. Mommy Brain: http://nnjmom.blogspot.com/

Next: select four new friends to add to the pollen count. I can’t remember who’s already done this, so ignore it if you did. And, as always, if you’re too busy or you just don’t want to, feel free to abstain.

Laney at Press On
Randi at I Have To Say
Andrea at Atypical Life
Amy at Mudpies and Paint

What were you doing 10 years ago?
1995. I was 22. Kevin and I had only been married 5 months. We were living in our first apartment in Vancouver, Washington, both working, and acting like newlyweds are supposed to. We had just purchased our first car together (a 1990 Nissan Sentra) after Kevin’s Jeep Cherokee kept breaking down and costing us money.

What were you doing 5 years ago?
2000. I was 27. Natalie was 3 1/2, Noah was 2, and Jonathan was about to turn 1. We had been living in our current town in northeastern Washington state for three years, and sharing a house with my Mom and Dad. They had just left to work with the International Christian Embassy in Jerusalem and we had bought our very first house by ourselves. I was worship coordinator at our church, which was going through a split at the time. It was a hard time. Our marriage wasn’t the happiest, and I had relied on my parents in many area where I should’ve been leaning on my husband. I was devastated that they moved away. Little did I know God was about to do a major healing in our marriage during the next six months. We also thought we were done having little ones, but God changed that, too.

What were you doing one year ago?
2004. I was 31. Natalie was 7 1/2, Noah was 6, Jonathan about to turn 5, and Josiah was 2 1/2. We had just started our third year of homeschooling. My Mom and Dad were back in our area, and we were settled in a routine of seeing them a couple times a week, but also happy to have our own home and happy marriage.

What were you doing yesterday?
Yesterday we did school in the morning, some housework, blogging, and then went to Family Night at church.

This next part I’ve done before, so I’m cutting and pasting my answers.
5 snacks you enjoy

1. Santitas and homemade guacamole with Pepsi
2. Peanut M’n'M’s with Pepsi
3. Nacho cheese Doritos and bean dip with Pepsi
(hmmm, I see a trend here…)
4. Santitas and jalapeno cheese dip…with Pepsi
5. Any kind of ice cream

5 songs I know all the words to

1. I Love You For Sentimental Reasons
2. L-O-V-E
3. A Bushel and a Peck
4. Amazing Grace
5. Great is Thy Faithfulness
(all songs I used to sing to my children when they were babies and I rocked them to sleep)

5 things you would do if you had a million dollars

1. build my parents and my sisters each a new home
2. build us a new home — my dream home (I already have it designed, just need the $$)
3. get completely out of debt
4. hire a housekeeper and cook so I could spend more time writing without neglecting homeschool time
5. fully fund and continually support my friend Lee’s orphanage in Mozambique

5 things you like doing

1. reading to my kids
2. crocheting
3. reading for myself
4. blogging
5. talking to my sisters on the phone

5 bad habits

1. Eating too much
2. Procrastinating
3. Neglecting the housework (see #2)
4. Blogging when I should be doing housework (see #3)
5. Being sarcastic

5 things I would never wear again
When I did this before, it was five things I would never wear, so no, I haven’t worn any of these things before. And I wouldn’t in the future.

1. a bikini
2. a tattoo
3. a piercing of any kind
4. cowboy boots
5. a grass skirt

5 favorite toys
1. This computer
2. My PDA
3. DVD player
4. Our public library
5. Cranium game

There’s been a lot of whining going on at our house this week. And the sad thing is, it’s not all from the kids! I admit it, I’ve been having a little pity party over here in my corner of the world. I mean, have any of you noticed that gas prices are getting a little high? (That’s sarcasm, in case you didn’t notice.) I know that I shouldn’t be feeling sorry for myself when there are so many people truly suffering from Katrina, but for the last couple of days I’ve had a had time keeping things in perspective.

My husband is our sole provider. (Remember that song? I was a closet Michael Bolton fan in high school. Sssh — don’t tell anyone.) And his place of work is not located in the same town as our home. He drives about 45 minutes each way to work. In a mini-van that doesn’t get the worst mileage, but it doesn’t get the best either. So this latest gas price hike has hit us hard. There wasn’t a lot of “give” in our budget to begin with, so the only place to find the extra gas money is groceries or our “slush” fund. We used to call this “entertainment”, but it doesn’t usually provide much in the way of recreation, so we re-named it. It goes for such entertaining things as clothing, prescriptions, doctor appointment copays, car repairs, license renewals and the very occasional outing.

As most of you parents know, the changing of the seasons usually brings the need for new clothes for the kiddies. Unless your children don’t grow from year to year, that is. But mine do. I’ve been blessed with hand-me-downs from my sisters at different times, and I return the favor. But as I went through the fall and winter clothes for my middle two on Sunday afternoon, I realized they needed some clothes. A lot, actually. Jonathan and Noah are only 15 months apart, and they wear the same shirt size, 6 or 7. In pants, Jonathan wears regular and Noah, the one with no hips to speak of, need slim. Josiah is set, but Natalie needs a few things. And our “slush” fund is pretty empty.

I’d like to say I handled this with grace and peace. A humble and quiet spirit. But that’s not exactly what happened. I panicked. I was angry. Not at anyone in particular, just at everyone. Like our governor for not putting a price cap on gas prices. Like Kevin’s boss for not paying him more money. Like anyone that crossed my mind at the time.

Then yesterday happened. The brake light in my van went on. A switch on my stove went out. One tiny switch, but a replacement costs $45 just for the part. And I freaked. I pouted. I was mad again, this time at God. Not a good place to be, but an honest one.

During my allotted computer time in the afternoon, my sister instant-messaged me with the news that their truck had blown up and was beyond repair. Not just the brakes, the entire truck. And my husband IM-ed me that the five-year-old daughter of a former co-worker was just diagnosed with Perthes Disease. Not her stove. Her child. In my experience, conviction doesn’t often come creeping in. It hits me like a semi and leaves me broken. Which I think is His point.

Today at Bible study I confessed my inability to trust to my prayer partner. We prayed for God to provide, and in the meantime, for me to get over myself. Right after Bible study, a friend gave me a huge lawn-and-garden trash bag full of clothes. Clothes that she told me I could use for my kids or take to the local consignment store to receive credit, whichever I needed. Not only were there many consignment-worthy items, there were 8 long-sleeve shirts in like-new condition in sizes 6 and 7. An hour later my sister IM-ed me with the news that she had been given some hand-me-downs for her son that are too big for him right now, but could I use some size six jeans and pants? At this point I am crying, amazed at God’s faithfulness to me when I am so unwilling to trust Him.

Great Is Thy Faithfulness

Great is Thy faithfulness, O God, my Father!
There is no shadow of turning with Thee.
Thou changest not; Thy compassions, they fail not.
As Thou hast been, Thou forever wilt be.

Great is Thy faithfulness;
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided.
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me.

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest;
Sun, moon, and stars in their courses above;
Join with all heaven in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy, and love.

Great is Thy faithfulness;
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided.
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me.

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth,
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide,
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow –
Blessings all mine, and ten thousand beside!

Great is Thy faithfulness;
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided.
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me.

(The Bible or the Axe was provided to me free of charge by Mind and Media, who received it from the publisher for the purpose of being reviewed.)

William Levi has an amazing story to tell. Mr. Levi was born a Messianic Christian in the Sudan, exiled to Uganda, returned to the Sudan as persecution and bloodshed began again, and was miraculously brought out of the Sudan by God in order to help his country rebuild.

I know I am sheltered. I am a white, Christian American, and I have not experienced suffering like Christians in other parts of the world. I forget, sometimes, that our freedom to worship is something other believers do not enjoy.

I did not realize that there is a Christian presence in Africa that dates back to the early church. My ideas of Africa have been shaped by our Western culture and media. Africa is somewhere we send missionaries to, not somewhere I expect to see Christianity as old as the church. And yet Africans have been worshiping God the Father as Jews for thousands of years. The same African Jews were brought the good news of Jesus Christ and believed. And they have suffered for their belief.

This book has a message that needs to be read and shared. It is too easy for us to turn a blind eye to the suffering endured by our sisters and brothers in Christ. Stories like Mr. Levi’s make it personal.

God brought William Levi out of the Sudan to receive an education and to help his nation in ways he never could have if he had remained. And he is helping and giving back, not only through this book, but through his ministry, Operation Nehemiah.

The Bible and the Axe does more than tell Mr. Levi’s story. It explains the history of the religious war in the Sudan in a way that I had never understood before. Anyone whose heart break’s over what’s happened in the Sudan, and is still happening in the Darfur region, needs to read this book. It will renew your desire to pray for our brothers and sisters around the world, and prompt you to help in any way you can.