Review of “Sex and the Supremacy of Christ”
(Sex and the Supremacy of Christ was provided to me free of charge by Mind and Media, who received it from the publisher for the purpose of being reviewed.)
Sex and the Supremacy of Christ
When I heard of this book, I must admit that my first thought was, “Another Christian book on sex? Hasn’t it all been covered?” Do a search on Amazon.com and you’ll come up with a numerous and varied list:
Sex in the Christian Marriage by Richard Meier
Intended for Pleasure: Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment in Christian Marriage by Ed and Gaye Wheat
Intimate Issues: 21 Questions Christian Women Ask About Sex by Linda Dillow
Sex and the Single Christian by Barry Colman
and the list goes on and on.
But when I read the description of this book, I thought it might be different. And it is.
Of the Christian books on sex that I’ve read, and I admit I’ve read a couple on the list above, this is the first to adequately convey both the sacred-ness of sex and the fact that God intended us to enjoy it. Within boundaries that He designed. And that’s where the two over-arching points of the book come in:
1. Sexuality is designed by God as a way to know God in Christ more fully.
2. Knowing God in Christ more fully is designed as a way of guarding our sexuality.
He also puts it another way:
“…in the first place, all misuses of our sexuality distort the true knowledge of Christ. And in the second place, all misuses of our sexuality derive from not having the true knowledge of Christ.”
He proves his first point — that sex was designed by God as a way to know Him more fully — by pointing to the many passages of scripture where God uses sexual language and imagery to “point to the promises and the pleasures of God’s relationship to His people and our relationship to Him.” (Ezekiel 16; Ephesians 5:25-27; Hosea 2:14-16, 19-20; Song of Solomon)
“God created us with sexual passion so that there would be language to describe what it means to cleave to Him in love and what it means to turn away from Him to others.”
In Chapter 2, Mr. Piper describes how the supremacy of Christ should affect us — and our sexuality.
“My conviction is that the better you know the supremacy of Christ, the more sacred and satisfying and Christ-exalting your sexuality will be. I have a picture in my mind of the majesty of Christ like the sun at the center of the solar system of your life. The massive sun, 333,000 times the mass of the earth, holds all the planets in orbit, even little Pluto, 3.6 billion miles away. So it is with the supremacy of Christ in your life. All the planets of your life — your sexuality and desires, your commitments and beliefs, your aspirations and dreams, your attitudes and convictions, your habits and disciplines, your solitude and relationships, your labor and leisure, your thinking and feeling — all the planets of your life are held in orbit by the greatness and gravity and blazing brightness of the supremacy of Jesus Christ at the center of your life. If He ceases to be the bright, blazing, satisfying beauty at the center of your life, the planets will fly into confusion, a hundred things will be out of control, and sooner or later they will crash into destruction.”
In chapter three, The Goodness of Sex and the Glory of God, Ben Patterson tells us:
“Pleasure is God’s idea and God is the devil’s enemy. The devil actually hates pleasure, because he hates the God of pleasure.”
He shows that God has given us pleasures in order to help us glory and pleasure in Him more fully. The devil’s tactic regarding those pleasures has always been to get us to misuse them, to pervert them, and in doing so, place them as our source of pleasure rather than the One who created them.
He goes on to show that the Bible is a book about marriage and sex and that the proper response to God in light of our sexuality is joy and gratitude.
Chapter four, Making All Things New: Restoring Pure Joy to the Sexually Broken, by David Powlison, is a message of hope to those of us who have been damaged by sexual sin — our own sin, others’ sin, or both.
In his own words:
“One theme runs through this chapter: “…He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Phil. 1:6). What does that lifelong process look like? How do you get from here to there? How does dirt transform into beauty? What is the battle like? You’re somewhere in the middle, but Christ has begun a good work in you. He has washed away true guilt. He has broken your willing bondage. Jesus knows His business well. He is looking out for you. He is working to clear away sin’s rot. Jesus is remaking you into a person who actually loves people and who begins to consider their best interests. Your opinions and impulses no longer reign. What He has begun, He will complete. On the final day, He will entirely remove the instincts and energies of sin from you.”
Mr. Powlison is realistic. He describes the process of healing in the area of our sexuality as a battle, and goes on to tell us that it is a longer, wider, deeper, more subtle war than we think. But most of all, he shows us where our hope and our victory are found. (This chapter also includes a great explanation of the sanctification process, which I previously posted here.)
R. Albert Mohler issues a challenge to the church in chapter five, Homosexual Marriage as a Challenge to the Church: Biblical and Cultural Reflections. He calls for us to:
“…be the people who cannot talk about homosexual marriage simply by talking about homosexual marriage. We must be the people who cannot talk about sex without talking about marriage, and the people who cannot talk about anything of substance or significance without dependence on the Bible. We must be the people who have a theology adequate to explain the deadly deception of sin, as well as a theology adequate to explain Christ’s victory over sin. We must be honest about sin as the denial of God’s glory, even as we point to redemption as the glory of God restored. We must be the people who love homosexuals more than homosexuals love homosexuality, and we must be the people who tell the truth about homosexual marriage and refuse to accept even its conceptual possibility, because we know what is at stake.”
The next section, Men and Sex, consists of two chapters: Sex and the Single Man by Mark Dever, Michael Lawrence, Matt Schmucker, and Scott Croft; and Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God: What Every Christian Husband Needs to Know by C.J. Mahaney.
Most of the chapter directed at single men contains what you would expect: instructions to remain celibate unless married. The authors also address the issues of dating and courtship, and tell us why we should not assume that increased levels of commitment — i.e. engagement or “going steady” — make increased levels of intimacy acceptable. A married man should relate to all women except his wife in a completely non-sexual way; the same rule should apply to single men. This completely contradicts modern society’s acceptance of serial dating and “trial marriages”.
The chapter addressed to married men uses the Song of Solomon as a guide for men to use in romancing their wives. But first, he shows that a purely symbolic interpretation of the Song of Songs is incorrect.
“Solomon’s Song of Songs is an entire book of the Bible devoted to the promotion of sexual intimacy within the covenant of marriage. It’s an eight-chapter feast of unbridled, uninhibited, joyous immersion in verbal and physical expressions of passion between a man and a woman.
Not a couple of verses. Not a chapter or two. God didn’t consider that enough. He decided to give us a whole book!
But can the Song of Solomon really be about sex? Isn’t the Bible about, well, spiritual stuff? It sure is. And as we’ll see, sexual intimacy within marriage has profound spiritual significance.”
The next section deals with sex and women, and addresses the same topics as the previous chapter, only in reverse.
In chapter eight, Sex and the Single Woman by Carolyn McCulley, she instructs single women to embrace their single-ness as a gift, and to trust God when the hope of marriage is deferred.
Chapter nine, Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God: What Every Christian Wife Needs to Know by Carolyn Mahaney, tells married women how to receive sex as a gift and as a way to encourage our husbands.
Although well-written, I didn’t find anything new or different in the two sections addressing men and women separately. All of the information is valuable, but it can be found in many other books. The limit of a single chapter on each of these topics keeps the authors from taking their points deeper.
The last section, History and Sex, is a mixed bag. Chapter ten, Martin Luther’s Reform of Marriage by Justin Taylor, is excellent. It is rich with information on Luther’s view of marriage and on Luther’s relationship with his wife, Katherine von Bora. For the section on sanctification of the ordinary alone, this chapter is a must-read, especially for parents.
“One of Luther’s great contributions to our view of the family involved the sanctification of the ordinary. Many sadly neglect their family and their friends because they are pouring all of their time into “ministry” — neglecting to see that all of life should be ministry and every sphere should be sanctified. We must have eyes to see that the ordinary duties of life contain great spiritual significance. Luther describes the message that the world whispers in our ear:
Now observe that when that clever harlot, our natural reason…, takes a look at married life, she turns up her nose and says, “Alas, must I rock the baby, wash its diapers, make its bed, smell its stench, stay up nights with it, take care of it when it cries, heal its rashes and sores…?”
But into this context Luther breathes fresh gospel air:
What then does Christian faith say to this? It opens its eyes, looks upon all these insignificant, distasteful, and despised duties in the Spirit, and is aware that they are all adorned with divine approval as with the costliest gold and jewels. It says, O God, because I am certain that Thou hast created me as a man and hast from my body begotten this child, I also know for a certainty that it meets with thy perfect pleasure. I confess to Thee that I am not worthy to rock the little babe or wash its diapers, or to be entrusted with the care of the child and its mother. How is it that I, without any merit, have come to this distinction of being certain that I am serving Thy creature and Thy most precious will? O how gladly will I do so, though the duties should be even more insignificant and despised. Neither frost nor heat, neither drudgery nor labor, will distress or dissuade me, for I am certain that it is thus pleasing in Thy sight…God, with all His angels and creatures is smiling — not because the father is washing diapers, but because he is doing so in Christian faith.” (emphasis mine)
I found chapter eleven, Christian Hedonists or Religious Prudes? The Puritans on Sex by Mark Dever, to be extremely dry. The main point — that stereotypes of the Puritans as a people afraid of sex and pleasure are wrong — is good information to have. But I think he could have made his point in half as many words.
Overall, I recommend this book to all believers. Even if it consisted solely of the chapters on healing of sexuality and Luther’s thoughts on marriage, it would be well worth your time.
I had no idea there were so many books on the subject. Thanks for posting the excerpts.
August 5th, 2005 at 4:44 pm